"Four fireworks shows and one parade, this is the best day ever!!!!"  This is what Aiden said to me in the middle of dancing and watching the sky waiting for the fireworks in Gloucester to start.  He was well past his usual bedtime and we were on borrowed time.  He was working on pure excitement.  Every weekend I have been trying to do one thing with him to make a memory.  It could be something little or a special lil lunch date with the two of us.  A couple weeks ago we went back into the Museum of Science.  We visited the butterfly place, the 4D theater and the Omni to see the Airplanes movie.  He loved the first and the third.  4d theater...not so much.  He was freaked out by the blasts of air so we left part way through.  Last night I woke him up to watch the end of the Pops concert and the fireworks in Boston.  We sat here in the dark and danced and laughed and giggled for over an hour.  He got an extra snack (goldfish) and couldn't have been happier.  Will try to write more often, I promise!

So this week Aiden and I said a very bittersweet goodbye to his counselor Melissa.  It was a sad day for us.  He has been seeing her every week for two and a half years.  Next Saturday he will start with a new counselor.  It will be a man, one that comes highly recommended.  I think that it will be a great thing.

Two weeks ago I took Aiden to the Roger Williams zoo.  It turns out, that with the Museum of Science membership, we got into the zoo for free.  He had a ball.  I am trying to figure out why my pictures won't upload.  For three days before we went he wanted nothing to do with the bears.  He is afraid of bears, although I am not sure why.  We walked in the front gate and that is all he wanted to see.  We saw every animal at the zoo.  I think his favorite part was watching the elephants take a bath.  My favorite part was seeing the pure joy on his face the whole day, but especially on the carousel.  I have pictures, but again they won't upload...hmmm.

This summer I am planning some more fun things.  I am hoping that I can bring him to the aquarium and I also got tickets for a whale watch for us.  We went on a whale watch last year and it was amazing.  So we will see what this summer holds for us.  Good night for now.

It's been a busy couple of weeks.  Aiden has found the chipmunk holes in our yard.  Now every morning he yells good morning to them and says hi every afternoon.  When we feed his birds he feeds hi chipmunk too.  This past weekend he and my mom had a cookie day.  He has been waiting for four months to make cookies again with her.  They made "monster" cookies that had peanut butter, oats, M+Ms, chocolate chips, white choc. chips and coconut in them.  

Aiden loves cold water, like Ice cold. He doesn't get that from me that's for sure.  The following is a conversation about ice.

"How cold are ice cubes?"
"Freezing. "
" No, I mean how cold, temperature?"

He wants to know how everything works and why things are the way they are.  He noticed the other morning that the dandelions were curled up.  He wanted to know why they weren't flowers.  Apparently it has something to do with pollination.

Today Mom had an appointment in Burlington, a follow up with one of her surgeons.  On the way home driving down (up) the highway today we passed a tractor trailer. I out loud wonder if it could be something cool under the tarps.(Yes I realize I watch too much shipping wars). Aiden mentioned that he saw a fly, but not that it was near the trailer. It went ahead of us and eventually in traffic we caught back up to it. I took a closer look at what looked like ordinary orange tarps only to realize what Aiden had been talking about. It was a giant trailer full of bees and hives. So for the net 20 minutes or so we talked about bees, and pollination and how our food depends on bees. Pretty cool. 

Sorry I haven't written in a while.  Aiden has been ok.  ALLERGIES!!!  He can't blow his nose yet (working on it) so everything is post nasal.  He gets coughing so much that he makes himself sick.  He was sent home from school today because of it.  I called and explained to them and they said that he could go back tomorrow.  Tonight he wanted Nana to read to him as usual.  I think that my child may be the only five year old that goes to bed with a night time story of ready ten birds from his "Birds of Massachusetts" book.  Silly boy.  That's all for tonight.  I will try to remember to write more often. The legos above were our Mother's Day project.

 
Sooo...I am divorced as of this past Thursday.  I am happy.  I never thought when I entered that relationship that it would end let alone be a horribly abusive one.  I thought that we would be happy and have a couple of kids and grow old together.  After years and years of every abuse imaginable I got out.  I got out the day he hurt Aiden.  I am trying to be the bigger person.  I could have demanded a lot more, could have fought a lot harder but where would that get me.  I chose to take the higher road.  The road I can be proud of and one day Aiden will be proud too.  Proud that I am happy and proud that I put HIM first.

Aiden is sick.  Low temp and runny nose.  Super snuggly, as mom found out all night last night.  He goes and snuggles with Nana because he knows that I will put him back to bed.  He is feeling better.  The day started out with him laying on the couch and not moving for a couple of hours.  He gradually moved off the couch to the floor, then started playing etc.  Hoping tomorrow he is better so I can get some more quotes for this.  Just wanted to update really quick and share what I have been through this week.  I promise the next one will be all about him.

Just a thought...with everything that has been happening the last couple of days, I am thankful that Aiden lives in blissful ignorance of it all.  So many kids know too much.  They hear us talking, or see things on the news when we don't realize it, they hear others talking.  I am trying my best to raise him as a loving caring person that treats everyone equally.  It is something that I can honestly say that if his father was involved things in this matter would look differently.  He would be hearing more.  Hearing more hatred, more racism, more negativity.  I am proud of my little man.  Proud that he sees everyone as equals and people to love and have fun with.  I don't want him growing up thinking that one person's life is more important than another. I want him to grow up and trust that if he needs help, the police are the good guys.  I know that is is idealistic and hard to fathom for some.  But for me and my five and a half year old, all lives matter.  I have friends that are not white, I have friends that are law enforcement, I have friends that their husbands, wives, significant others are in law enforcement. ALL LIVES MATTER.  I know that people won't agree with me, I know that there are bad cops, and many good people that aren't "white".  But for today, for my life and for my son I am trying to teach peace and equality instead of hatred and racism.  Some of you may agree, some of you may disagree, but that is your right, that is your choice.  Please don't come down on me because of what I believe and what I choose to teach my child.

Here are a couple "one liners" from the last couple of days.  Hope that you enjoy.

A- "I don't know why Nora keeps stealing food from the bag. I gave her food and her WHOLE bowl is full. I gave her like three or four or five scoops of food. Why does she keep stealing food from the bag? Doesn't she realize that she has food in her bowl?"

I told aiden if he doesn't start listening we weren't going to feed his birds. "they aren't my birds, they are everyone's birds"

It is extremely hard being a single mom.  This morning was a tough morning.  He didn't want to put pants on.  we had yelling, hitting, screaming and crying.  I finally got the pants on them and they wouldn't stay up.  Zipper and button not done up.  I asked him if it was ok how he acted and he said no.

He makes me extremely proud though.  He knows that he needs to apologize.  He knows when he makes a mistake that we ay sorry and hug.

Like most kids it is like pulling teeth to get him to tell me what he is doing in school.  He say that they play outside everyday but not much else.  I see evidence though, the other day when my sister was asking him math questions and he looked at the clock.  He was using it to do addition and subtraction.  WOW!  I wouldn't have thought of that.

He has gone into my mom's room a couple of night this week in the middle of the night.  He said that he had bad dreams.  He says they are about bears and he is afraid of bears.  I told him he sleeps on a bear ("Poly bear" which is a large stuffed panda bear).  He said he wasn't afraid of him because he was dead already.  I tried to explain to him that he was fake and not dead.  I think it may have worked.  I want to take him to the zoo to see bears so he won't be so afraid of them.  

Over the weekend mom had to make sure she could get in the car as she had an appointment today.  Aiden has been waiting for months to go on a ride with her to see sky scrapers.  So that's what we did.  Got mom in the car and drove through Boston, turned around and came back.  He had fun and we made sure that she was safe getting out and into a car.

This feels like a very disjointed entry, but here it is.  Hope that you enjoy.  Goodnight for now.